Regular readers of this blog are probably familiar by now with commenter Trip and “quote wars,” a game he and I and the rest of you wackos often derail comment threads into (so not a stickler here for making sure comments stay on topic — topic schmopic, I say on that).
A few weeks back, a couple of us asked Trip for a list of his favorite movie lines, in part to better prep us for future wars (hey, that was my motive, at least), and at long, long last, the Trip List appears in print! (Along with a graphic drawn by ME PERSONALLY, featuring a favorite line from the movie Airplane. And yes, I won’t quit my day job and go into art, no worries, ya jerks.)
Here’s Trip’s intro:
Well, I’m really only brushing the surface here, and I’d probably face-palm at the mention of a few others I *should have* included here, nevertheless here’s a first list of quotes I like, which were more instantly memorable to me, and which I’ve used fairly regularly over the years on friends and co-workers alike…
And my follow-up intro is that if he missed any of your favorites, you know what to do, y’all. Hit it! (And oh, I know you will. I know I will. I know we all will. We cool like that.)
Enjoy (and thanks for all the hard work, Trip!)!
THE TRIP LIST v.1.0 (edited to add the occasional self-serving link to a Boyfriend write-up or movie review where relevant, which was clearly not nearly as often as it should’ve been — I haven’t featured Bill Murray yet? What the what?)
- “I came here to kick ass and chew bubble gum…and I’m all out of bubble gum.” – George Nada (Roddy Piper), They Live
- “We are the music makers…and we are the dreamers of dreams.” – Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder), Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
- “Your father was captain of a starship for twelve minutes. He saved eight hundred lives, including your mother’s. And yours. I dare you to do better.” – Capt. Christopher Pike (Bruce Greenwood), Star Trek (2009)
- “All right you primitive screwheads, listen up! You see this? This… is my boomstick!” – Ash (Bruce Campbell), Army of Darkness
- “Gimme some sugar, baby.” – Ash (Bruce Campbell), Army of Darkness
- “Bitch…you don’t have a future.” – Beatrix Kiddo (Uma Thurman), Kill Bill Pt. 2
- “Tell me of your homeworld, Usul.” – Chani (Sean Young), Dune
- “You need to be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how!” – Rhett Butler (Clark Gable), Gone with the Wind
- “No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die!” – Auric Goldfinger (Gert Fröbe), Goldfinger
- “Until at last, I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the mountainside.” – Gandalf (Ian McKellen), Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
- “Dang! You got shocks, pegs…lucky!” – Napoleon (Jon Heder), Napoleon Dynamite
- “Usul, we have wormsign the likes of which even God has never seen.” – Stilgar (Everett McGill), Dune
- “My name is a killing word.” – Paul Atreides (Kyle McLaughlin), Dune
- “Brandy! Throw more brandy!” – Prince Hapnick (Jack Lemmon), The Great Race
- “I crap bigger than you.” Curly (Jack Palance), City Slickers
- “I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.” – Ripley (Sigourney Weaver), Aliens
- “Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.” – Clemenza (Richard Castellano), The Godfather
- “I like them French fried potaters.” – Karl (Billy Bob Thornton), Sling Blade
- “Let’s show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown!” – Dr. Pete Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters
- “Game over, man, game over!” Private Hudson (Bill Paxton), Aliens
- “Well that’s great, that’s just fuckin’ great, man. Now what the fuck are we supposed to do? We’re in some real pretty shit now man…” Pvt. Hudson (Bill Paxton), Aliens
- “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here, this is the War Room!” – President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers), Dr. Strangelove
- “It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.” – Elwood Blues (Dan Aykroyd), The Blues Brothers
- “If you’d have fought one whit below your abilities, I’d have given you a good scar to remind you.” – Gurney Halleck (Patrick Stewart), Dune
- “Only I didn’t say ‘Fudge.’ I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the ‘F-dash-dash-dash’ word!” – Ralphie narrating as adult (Jean Shepherd), A Christmas Story
- “Only one thing in the world could’ve dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window.” – Ralphie narrating as adult (Jean Shepherd), A Christmas Story
- “Well, I’m a mushroom-cloud-layin’ motherfucker, motherfucker! Every time my fingers touch brain, I’m Superfly T.N.T., I’m the Guns of the Navarone!” – Jules (Samuel L. Jackson), Pulp Fiction
- “Well, that’s a huge noggin. That’s a virtual planetoid!” – Stuart Mackenzie (Mike Myers), So I Married an Axe Murderer
- “I’m not kidding, that boy’s head is like Sputnik; spherical but quite pointy at parts! Now that was offside, wasn’t it? He’ll be crying himself to sleep tonight, on his huge pillow.” – Stuart Mackenzie (Mike Myers), So I Married an Axe Murderer
- “The fact that you’ve got ‘replica’ written down the side of your guns…and the fact that I’ve got ‘Desert Eagle .50’ written down the side of mine…should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now…fuck off!” – Bullet Tooth Tony (Vinnie Jones), Snatch
- “Well, he should have armed himself if he’s going to decorate his saloon with my friend.” – William Munny (Clint Eastwood), Unforgiven
- “I’d like to think that the last thing that went through his head, other than that bullet, was to wonder how the hell Andy Dufresne ever got the best of him.” – Red narrating (Morgan Freeman), The Shawshank Redemption
- “Ha ha! You didn’t count on my loyal army of prostitutes, did you?” – Mitch (Norm MacDonald), Dirty Work
- “You will learn a system of self-defense that I learned after two seasons of fighting in the octagon.” – Rex (Diedrich Bader), Napoleon Dynamite
- “I ain’t got time to bleed!” – Blain (Jesse Ventura), Predator
- “The light that burns twice as bright burns for half as long – and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy.” – Tyrell (Joe Turkel), Blade Runner
- “Ray, when someone asks you if you’re a god, you say ‘YES!'” – Winston (Ernie Hudson), Ghostbusters
- “Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.” – Dr. Pete Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters
- “Generally you don’t see that kind of behavior in a major appliance.” – Dr. Pete Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters
- “I hate Illinois Nazis.” – Jake Blues (John Belushi), The Blues Brothers
- “1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. Oswald was a fag.” – McManus (Stephen Baldwin), The Usual Suspects
- “I like how you burritoed me in the sofa cushions.” – Alex Goran (Vera Farmiga), Up In the Air
- “Mikey, why don’t you tell that nice girl you love her? I love you with all-a my heart, if I don’t see-a you again soon, I’m-a gonna die!” – Clemenza (Richard Castellano), The Godfather
- “Training is NOTHING. Will is EVERYTHING,” – Henri Ducard (Liam Neeson), Batman Begins
It’s finally here! My annual list of Best Good Movies, Bad Movies, and Books of the year! Go check it out and then come back over here to tell me everything I got totally wrong. Otherwise, HOW WILL I LEARN?
Published another piece at Writer, Writing, Writest this week (an online literary magazine I’m both writing for and helping to edit). It’s called “Bloomin'” and this week’s theme was “My Summer Vacation.”
Are you guys watching Men of a Certain Age Monday nights on TNT? It’s really good. Watch it. It makes me think of Thirtysomething, except there aren’t any obnoxious babies (and by “babies,” I refer less literally to infants and more metaphorically to the infantile). You’re only four episodes behind if you leap in right now and you’ll catch on fast. So leap, already. Leap! Scott Bakula was actually a Boyfriend of the Week, you old-timers might remember, but I lost his write-up years ago in a terrible server transition accident. Plans to refeature him reignited immediately upon seeing him as a messy-haired 40-something. And Andre Braugher, of course, long, long overdue. And Ray Romano! Who would’ve thought, Ray Romano! I’m in love. Loving it. Loving it. In love with it. I love it.
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