Archive for the ‘Jeffrey Donovan’ Category

MOVIES: Five in 5-7-5

April 13, 2009

Okay, look, I’m way behind on movie reviews, and the reason I’m way behind on movie reviews is because I keep watching GOOD movies instead of BAD movies, and writing about good movies is kind of boring.  Once in a while, it can be fun.  But more than three in a row is, like, absolute torture.

To reset things a bit, I’m now going to review five decent-to-good movies for you using only haiku.  Then we can get back to the crappy movies, which are just a heck of a lot more entertaining to say stuff about.  (Tip: If you want a real plot description, click on the “Netflix me” link and you can find one there.)

The Changeling (2008)
Angelina Jolie (looking sad and red-lipsticked), Jeffrey Donovan (channeling Gabrielle Anwar’s really bad Irish accent from S1 of Burn Notice), John Malkovich (NOT playing a dick for a change).  Directed by ex-BoTW Clint Eastwood.

Based on a true tale —
I really wish it had been
A half-hour shorter.
[Netflix me]

Milk (2008)
Sean Penn (is amazing), James Franco (is skinny), Emile Hersch (is wearing the same glasses I had in 1983), Diego Luna (is going to break your heart), Josh Brolin (is really, really talented).

I cannot believe
We are still having these same
Damn rallies (we suck).
[Netflix me]

Doubt (2008)
Drama (based on play)
Phillip Seymour Hoffman (is creepy from scene one), Meryl Streep (is totally overrated in this), Amy Adams (is cute, but isn’t she kinda always?)

Everyone loved it.
I thought the acting was good
But the plot was meh.
[Netflix me]

Tell No One (2008)
Drama, Foreign (French with English subtitles, sorry, Lizzie)
Francois Cluzet (my God, it’s Bob from French Kiss!), Kristen Scott Thomas (speaks French sort of oddly, but is cute about it)

When this one ended
I thanked the screenwright aloud
For his new ending.
[Netflix me (available for Watch Now)]

The Secret Life of Bees (2008)
Dakota Fanning (tween), Queen Latifah (queen), Paul Bettany (mean)

Sure, it is cheesy.
Who cares, when it stars The Queen?
She is teh awesome.
[Netflix me]

Summertime, and the Lazing is Easy

July 7, 2008

Yay! It’s July! And all our favorite summer TV shows are coming back! Here’s the time line for all the ones I’ll be tuning into — make sure you let me know in the comments if I missed any of your faves!

Thursday, July 10th

Burn Notice, Season 2. USA Network, Thursdays at 10pm. What do you MEAN you aren’t a Burn Notice fan? Did you know it has Bruce Campbell in it? (Not to mention ex-Boyfriend Jeffrey Donovan.)  Isn’t that ’nuff said? No? Well, then how ’bout if I describe it as a cross between MacGyver and The Rockford Files?  Sold!

Tune in this season to find out just how in the heck they’re going to work in that Cylon subplot (I just lost 48.5% of you with that one, sorry — Trisha Helfer, better known as “Six” from Battlestar Galactica, joins the cast this year. Though, presumably, not as a toaster. Hey wait, unless. . . holy hell, is it possible? Is Sam Axe the twelfth Cylon? MY MIND IS BLOWING!).

Friday, July 11th

Flashpoint, Season 1. CBS, Fridays at 10pm. This is the first Canadian TV show to be broadcast on a major American network (during primetime, anyway) since way, way back in 1994 when CBS picked up Due South. That alone is enough to get me to tune in. But since it also stars Veronica Mars’s father (Enrico Colantoni), I was already kinda sold on the idea. (p.s. Why I haven’t I made Enrico Colantoni a Boyfriend of the Week yet? I love that guy!)

Anyway, this series is about a special unit of cops in Toronto who do stuff like hostage negotiation. It sounds a lot like a Canadian version of that old TNT series Wanted (starring Gary Cole and that guy who plays Allison’s brother on Medium — I love that guy, whoever he is) which I really liked but which got canceled after the first season because of all the people in this country who would rather watch Farmer Wants a Wife than a smart show about complex characters. (Those of you about to email me with “Dear Meg: So You Think You Can Dance is not exactly The Sopranos,” can suck it, by the way.) It’s possible this one won’t succeed either but I have high hopes. And if all else fails, there’s always Galaxy Quest (for a good non-V. Mars Colantoni fix).

Stargate Atlantis, Season 5. Sci-Fi Network, Fridays at 10pm. I don’t actually watch this show, I just WISH I watched this show.  I’ve seen about two episodes — random episodes — and thought it was a total blast. The problem is, now it’s in season FIVE, which means I have a lot of catching up to do. Daunting, to say the least, especially when you, like me, have TV OCD (I can’t bear to jump into a show in the middle — must start at S1E1!). I promise to get started on that ASAP, though. Cute guys! Great plots! Extreme funniness! Why did it take me so long to figure out this one was great? Gah, I’m firing myself.

Monday, July 14th

The Closer, Season 4. TNT, Mondays at 9pm. This show blows me away, I have to confess. You know how some shows get worse and worse over the years (Dear ER: Get a sucking chest wound already and leave me in peace, I beg of you!)? I swear to god, this show just gets BETTER AND BETTER. Last season, every single episode was utterly brilliant, and I don’t just throw that B-word around lightly, as well you know. If you thought Kyra Sedgewick’s accent was annoying (this is what I usually hear from people who don’t watch), tune in for J.K. Simmons instead. (p.s. Why haven’t I made J.K. Simmons a Boyfriend of the Week yet? I love that guy!)

(Saving Grace also returns July 14th, by the way, but I didn’t make it past episode one of that one. Gak.)

Tuesday, July 15th

The Cleaner, Season 1. A&E, Tuesdays at 10pm. I confess I’m a bit wary of this new series, which stars ex-Boyfriend Benjamin Bratt as an “extreme interventionist” who uses radical methods to save people from drug addiction. It could be really, really good. But it could also offend the ever-living beheysoos out of me. I work in the field of substance abuse and thus know rather a lot about this topic, and thus have rather strong opinions about this topic (this is why I had to stop watching House, for example). We’ll see how this one goes. I’ll report back after the first 1-2 episodes and let you know what I think.

Wednesday, July 16th.

Project Runway! Project Runway! Project Runway! YAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!! Need I say any more? Bravo, Wednesdays at 9pm.

Friday, July 18th

Monk, Season 7; and Psych, Season 3. USA, 9pm and 10pm. Okay, I’ll confess this: Last season of Monk was a little lackluster for me. I’m getting a little bit tired of the OCD schtick, and there were a few episodes last season where I felt like they truly lost sight of the depth of Monk’s character, which is the part that takes him from laughable OCD nutjob to sympathetic human being. Laughable OCD nutjob is not nearly as interesting to me, in part because the fictional character I am most frequently compared to happens to BE Adrian Monk (watch me eat M&Ms sometime and I think you’ll understand why). HOWEVER, as with ER, this is a show I will never be able to stop watching until it’s officially given the boot.  Why?  Because I used to love it so, so much, and it’s too hard for me to let go before it’s actually ENDED.  See above re: TV OCD. But maybe it’ll be better this year. Stranger things have happened.

Psych, on the other hand, is another one of those shows that has been improving with every passing episode. It’s just getting funnier and funnier as the actors settle into their characters and the crazy goofballery settles into even more crazier goofballery (or whatever I mean by that). And oh god, that ad where they have clips of Sean running through all his various nicknames for Gus? I want to put that ad on my iPod so I can run it on a loop all day long, but I’m worried that that much laughter might literally KILL ME. Best ad ever. If you only watched the first few episodes of this one way back in season one, you’ve got to give it another try. Trust me — smart banter rules!

Tuesday, July 29

Eureka, Season 3. Sci Fi Network, Tuesdays, 9pm. Did I just use the phrase “smart banter”? Would it cheapen it if I use the same phrase again just one paragraph later? Because if you love smart banter (and also geeky science stuff), and you aren’t watching Eureka, I have but one word for you: Duuuuuuuude!

I love this show. Clever, weird, funny, and starring one of the most adorable men on television today (Colin “Butt Chin” Ferguson). Back when I went on hiatus last year, I featured Jeffrey Donovan as the first in a planned trilogy of summer TV gorgeousness — guess who numbers 2 and 3 were supposed to be? If you guess Colin Ferguson, you got number 2 right. And number 3 — well, let’s keep that one a mystery for now. Watch for Colin’s write-up, and the Mystery Man’s, coming later this summer!

Jeez, is that enough TV for you? With all the great stuff returning this month, how am I ever going to have time for all the Netflix Instant Viewing stuff I plan to watch on my new Roku Netflix Player (which I LOVE, by the way)?

Guess I’ll have to quit my day job. Any advice on how to swing this with the spouse? “Um, hon? Do you mind if I quit my job, watch TV 14 hours a day, and gain 50 pounds? What do you mean, ‘Hell no’?! YOU NEVER SUPPORT MY DREAMS!!”

New Boyfriend is Up!

August 4, 2007

You know what’s really hard sometimes?

Being me.

Oh no. No, no. I know you think it’s easy. I mean, you probably think I just sit around all week eating chocolates, watching TV, and drooling over hotties, right? It’s never occurred to you that this might not be as easy as I make it look, has it. HAS IT!?

Well, let me tell you something, people. This job is HARD. And what’s more, the pay is absolute crap. The last three weeks in particular have been even more torturous than usual. Why? Because I’ve been driving myself absolutely INSANE struggling to decide who to feature next. I’ve been trying to get at least two write-ups a month posted this year, and as July’s minutes tick-tocked right past me, I began growing more and more anxious about getting my second write-up posted before the 31st rolled around (which, obviously, I failed to do). I felt like I was spending all my free time working on write-ups. But I just couldn’t seem to get any of them finished.

[Keep reading the write-up.]

Coming to a TV set near you. . . Mr. Bruce Campbell!

June 26, 2007

This Thursday night, a new series is coming to the USA Network. It’s called Burn Notice and stars Jeffrey Donovan as a spy fired by the CIA who tries to score some contract crime-solving cases while also attempting to figure out who backstabbed him in the government. Entertainment Weekly gave it a solid B and said it looked like light-hearted fun, but what really caught my eye were the names of two supporting actors. First, Sharon Gless, forever known to me as Detective Christine Cagney from that great old 80’s series Cagney & Lacey, but more importantly, a name I never expected to see showing up on the cast of a TV show: Mr. Bruce Campbell!

This is me, dying and going to Heaven.

In other great Boyfriend-related news, I heard a rumor that Brandon Routh is getting back into shape in preparation for a Superman sequel (tentatively titled, Superman: Man of Steel). No verification on this from either Warner Bros. or director Bryan Singer, but I’m allowing myself to feel some hope in any case. The rumor I heard said Routh expects to start filming early next year. All together now: Woot!